I Voted, no. 3

Apropos of nothing, presented without comment.

With thanks to Stephanie Hofeller.

 

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Another Star For Their Flag

Fuck the CIA.
That's pretty much all I've got for you on this one.

Fuck the CIA, and fuck the USA.

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Blue Box Chardonnay

Because It's Always 2016 Somewhere In The World.

So, according to Senator Support Our Troops, the Donkeycrats are in danger of veering "too far to the left", and that the issues Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez ran on -- and won -- would somehow "alienate" Midwesterners.

Yeah, that's right, you heard it here first -- folks in Iowa City, Flint or Milwaukee don't give a rat's ass about the cost of housing, education or healthcare, or about depressed wages, or collective bargaining rights, or the quality of their water.

Keep on swigging that Centrist Chardonnay, Senator.
Wine, spoh-dee oh-dee, drinkin' wine.

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Blue Wave

From all the howling in the MSM these days, you'd think they were expecting not just a "Blue Wave", but a "Blue Tsunami" -- except the numbers say they'll be lucky to get a "Blue Ripple", and in Texas right now it's looking more like a "Blue Tidepool", pitting a bland corporate-looking white-boy Democrat against an incumbent whose head is sculpted entirely of suet pudding.

This on top of the fact that on social media, the Democratic Party politburo, trolls and fangirls are going with the formula that worked so well for them last time:

• Run a bland, donor class-approved corporate Centrist.
• Threaten and shame Left voters.
• Gaslight, insult, and lie to Left voters.
• Bully and smear Left electoral challengers.
• Hope the GOP candidate is revealed to be a pedophile.

Cowabunga, dudes.

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"Would Whoever Can Reach The Phone..."

For those of you not of a certain age, a popular college fad in the 1950s was telephone booth stuffing. In fact, there were often competitions between colleges to see just how many students could cram themselves in. Oh, yeah, and you might also want to ask your parents or a great uncle what a telephone booth was.

Which brings us to the state of play in the current GOP Presidential nomination battle royale... I can't wait to see what the first debates are going to be like. I won't bother watching unless they make 'em do it in a big steel cage, with Mean Gene Okerlund as the moderator.

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And, here's some more rock 'em, sock 'em election action:
"Cromnibus Island", December 2014
"Yer Liberals, no. 2: Make Him Do It", November 2012
"Middle Class First", October 2012
"Blankness You Can Believe In", April 2012
"My Little Party", February 2012

I'm With Stupid

So, Hillary Clinton is taking another whack at becoming America's Margaret Thatcher -- as if we hadn't seen this coming since about 2009.

A lot's been made about the vacuous, smarmy campaign kickoff video, of course, but an equal amount of confusion and mockery has arisen around Hillary's campaign logo. Aside from the fact that it looks like the logo for a plus-size women's fashion warehouse outlet, there's also the matter of the arrow pointing to the right.

It goes without saying that a lot of your denser Liberals and Pwogwessives are puzzled; one Pwog tweeted to the effect that it's a mistake, and that the arrow wasn't pointing in the direction Mrs. Bill wanted to take the country in. Oh, for Christ's sake, somebody tie me to a railroad track. Of course that's the direction she wants to take the country. This should be obvious to anyone who's been paying attention to Hillary ever since she carpetbagged her way into the Senate -- with her support for US/NATO bombing campaigns in Serbia, her support for the Patriot Act, her support for Israel, and the way she damn' near broke her neck rushing to support Bush's crimes in Iraq. You'd have to have been living in a cave for the past fifteen years (this would take in most Liberals) to not realize what a horrid, bloody, greedy warmongering neocon authoritarian she is.

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In Search Of Legacy

With the conclusion of the recent Dempocalypse, President Sparkle Pony is about as lame as a duck can get. In fact, he holds the record, having been a lame duck pretty much since he took office.

So, according to this recent report at Al Jazeera, he's jetting off to Asia trying to forget about the election and be all Presidential and statesmanlike n'shit, trying to beef up his "legacy", whatever the hell that means.

I don't know what he's so worried about; between the drone warfare, the shielding of war criminals, the climbing into bed with bankers, the corporate healthcare sweetheart deal, and the NSA, it looks like President Hope's got more legacy than he can shake a stick at.

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God Save The Queen

Y'know that old saying about how history happens the first time as tragedy and the second time as farce? Well, what happens if it happens as farce the first time? You know, like when Obama was first running, and all the Liberals were screaming about how if you didn't support him you were some kind of racist, even though anybody who did even the most cursory examination of his background would've told you that the guy was a total sham, a lightweight who pretty much skated into every office he held, a classic Clinton Democrat, a flunkie of the Pentagon and Wall Street?

So, here comes Hillary Clinton, taking another stab at it now that Obama's warmed the seat up for her, and I can just see it now, the same old shit -- if I don't support Hillary, I'm a mean old sexist Teabagger, even though anybody who hasn't been living in a goddamn' cave for the past twenty years totally knows the score on this nasty old harpie. Anyone who points out her involvement on the board of Wal-Mart, her support for Israeli atrocities in Palestine, her support for the disaster in Iraq, or her support for corporate dictatorship is going to get a bunch of shrieking from geezing old '70s dead-enders who can't talk about anything but Roe V. Wade and the Glass Ceiling™.

So, folks, would it be safe to assume that American Feminism is pretty much dead? I mean, c'mon -- Glass Ceiling? "Lean In"? Roe V. Wade? Is that all you tired old broads have got for us?

But, more importantly -- who's going to hold Hillary's crown while she takes the oath of office?

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Congressional Oversight

Those of you who've been following the recent decriminalization of marijuana in DC -- and the current Initiative 71 legalization campaign -- have had a little taste of how badly Congress jerks us around in terms of self-government and self-determination.

We've had meddling Congressmen trying to scuttle our gun control laws, prevent us from funding abortions and, most recently, the notorious Maryland Rep. Andy Harris trying to stop us from implementing marijuana decriminalization -- and probably one of the biggest fears right now is that Congress will try to interfere in the upcoming election here, where we'll be electing a new Mayor, and voting on whether or not to legalize marijuana.

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Egyptian Landslide

What if they gave an election and nobody came?

I caught this article on Al Jazeera the other day, reporting that owing to poor turnout, the Egyptian election commission has been forced to extend voting for a third day. In fact, Egyptians are avoiding the polls in such large numbers that the election commission is threatening fines for not voting -- which kind of pushes not voting into the realm of non-violent civil disobedience, when you think about it.

I couldn't help thinking that dissident/third parties in the US -- especially on the Left -- could learn something from this. For many years now, Americans have staged a sort of de facto boycott of elections, but it hasn't been organized and sent no unified message about oligarchy and corruption. Perhaps instead of pissing away time and energy trying to get "elected", outfits like the Green Party could instead send a message about the state of US electoral politics by calling for a boycott -- a "No Vote" campaign, mobilizing non-voters to take to the streets to express their intent and their reason for not voting, smashing the old stereotype of the "apathetic" non-voter.

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Carpetbagger Defeats Teabagger!

A political analyst interviewed on The Daily Show late last week referred to the two major party candidates for Governor of Virginia as the worst candidates he'd ever seen, remarking that Virginia voters were being asked to choose between "cancer and a heart attack". That summed it up perfectly, if you ask me.

So it was that this past Tuesday, Virginians chose former Donkeycratic Party honcho and Clinton money man Terry McAwful -- uhh, MacAuliffe -- over Tea Party loon Ken Cuccinelli to occupy the Governor's mansion... not that it'd make any difference in the long run.

God, I hate democracy.

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Dollar Iconography

This is another series of posters for the March Against Corruption scheduled to happen “everywhere” on November 2.
This design is laid out to allow for activists to insert information about their local events, and comes in two versions: one for events local to the DC Metro area, and another version for “everywhere”.

Find out more about the March Against Corruption on Farcebook.

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For  DC Metro Area local, 2mb
For “Everywhere”, 1.9mb

Wall Of Oligarchy

Ever notice what a pain in the ass it is for dissident/third parties to get any media attention? They hardly ever get any media because it’s damn’ near impossible to get onto the ballot. They can’t get onto the ballot because it’s damn’ near impossible to raise any money. They can’t raise any money because it’s damn’ near impossible to get any media… well, I think you can see where this is headed.

Only The Party is able to raise the gobsmacking amounts of cash needed to get its views into the media, which means that Party propaganda and talking points are all over the TV like a bad rash. Third parties, independent and dissident candidates are pretty much locked out because the tepid liberal and raving rightist freak wings of The Party collude to rig the rules so that they’re the only ones who get to participate in the televised debates — which takes us back to what a pain in the ass it is for dissident/third parties to get any media attention.

This is the first in a series of posters being created for the March Against Corruption, an international day of action — inspired by the uprisings in Brazil — being planned for November 2. Find out more about the March Against Corruption on Farcebook.

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Yer Liberals, Episode 2: "Make Him Do It"

Remember back in school, when the class bully would dump your books, shove you into your locker and try to shake you down for your lunch money, and you'd say "hey, c'mon, quit it!", and the bully would get up in your face and sneer "make me"? Well, that's the mental image I get when I hear Pwogwessives and Liberals talking about what they need to do to get Obama to honor his promises and implement more progressive policies, and they say that they need to "hold his feet to the fire" and "make him do it".

Trouble is, they had their chance to put pressure on Obama and the Donkeycrats, but once again, they pissed it away -- in the recent so-called election, when they could've organized a boycott, withholding their support and sending a message to the Donkeycrats in the only language they understand: defeat at the polls.

Instead, the Pwogs and Liberals spent four years pissing and moaning about how Obama went back on all his promises and pretty much continued all of Bush's policies of warmongering, imperialism and attacks on civil liberties -- and then turned right around and voted for him again. Christ, that's got to be the most retarded thing I've ever heard ot -- real, honest-to-God short-bus-riding, helmet-wearing-in-class, drooling-in-your-lap deep-down retarded.

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At Chris Floyd's Empire Burlesque: Napalm in the Morning (Drones in the Afternoon): The Smell of Victory Stirs Progressives to Action

Save Big Bird!

By now, all of you have heard Mittens’ Tourettes outburst about PBS funding at the last debate — you remember, the one where Obummer had his ass handed to him? Mittens commented in one breath that he liked Big Bird and Jim Lehrer, but if he were elected, he’d elminate PBS funding and throw them both out of work.

The Donkeycrats, desperate to make lemonade out of lemons, have taken to using that moment in a new campaign ad mocking Mittens for his popping off about Public Broadcasting — at which point, true to the Donkeycrats’ luck these days, the Sesame Street foundation pitched a fit over the Obummer campaign’s use of Big Bird in a campaign ad. Yeah, when it rains, it pours, huh?

My first thought on hearing Mittens’ little brain fart was “Christ, Mittens, why the hell are you doing handing the Donkeycrats ammunition like that?” Then, after settling down a bit, I realized that Mittens was being crazy like a fox, jerking Liberals’ chains and making them waste their time getting their panties in a twist over petty crap like cutting back PBS funding and endangering Big Bird. Still, this could be a plus for the Donkeycrats as it’ll give them one more way to divert Liberals’ attention from Obummer’s economic policy failures, imperialist adventurism overseas, and destruction of basic liberties at home by keeping them all pissing their pants over yet more meaningless hot-button culture-war bullshit — and to be perfectly frank, I couldn’t be enjoying the whole show more if I tried.

Mind you, though, this whole brouhaha fails to take into consideration the fact that Public Broadcasting has been a corporate whore since the beginning, even back in the days when they actually had decent programming, back when they picked up all those seasons of Monty Python and Fawlty Towers, and Carl Sagan’s Cosmos series, and broadcast the Grateful Dead’s New Year’s Eve show, and all those old Dr. Who episodes. These days they’re even worse, pure desolation for those of us looking for truly progressive viewpoints on the airwaves — infested with corporate apologists and Democratic Party mouthpieces — so I, quite honestly, could give a rat’s ass less about whether PBS is funded or not.

Still, Liberal America’s having a cow. Oh, noes! Wherever will they go to hear banal stories of the trials and foibles of affluent Liberals on This American Life? Wherever will they go to get that feeling of superiority they get from smug inanity like Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me? Wherever will Liberals go for their Democratic Party talking points and thirty-six solid hours of bluegrass? No, not Big Bird! God help ‘em, the End Times are here!

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Middle Class First

“We do best when the middle class is doing well.”
–Barack Obama, Presidential Debate 10.03.2012

So, I’m seeing a lot of footage of Obama rallies on TV lately showing us lots of raving Dembots waving signs reading “Middle Class First”.

Now, on the surface, this sounds really nice and progressive populist and all, until you stop and think of how Obama bailed out the banks and Wall Street and left the foreclosed and unemployed hanging out to dry, and when you think about how the Presidential candidates of both wings of the Party pandered to the middle class while totally ignoring the working class and the poor. In fact, at my count, at last Wednesday night’s “debate”, I heard the phrase “middle class” spoken at least fifteen times in the first half hour — until I had to stop watching because my eyes were glazing and my brain was dribbling out of my ears.

To be honest, I’m actually becoming really annoyed at the amount of fawning and gushing and pandering directed at the Middle Class™ by politicians at the media, even as they display indifference — or, in some cases, flat-out hostility — towards the working class, the poor, and the formerly middle-class who’ve fallen into poverty owing to extended unemployment or foreclosure.

Let’s also not forget that generally, the Middle Class™ is where all the narrow-mindedness, conformity, materialism and selfishness live.They consume the most resources and complain the most about taxes while demanding the best of everything — roads, schools, public services — while joining in the villification of the poor and identifying with the rich, even as the rich continue to screw them royally.

So, perhaps a more accurate slogan for the Obama campaign might be “Middle Class First, And Throw The Poor A Bone If There’s Any Left”.

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Do You Feel Lucky?

The other night, a nasty old man got up in front of the whole country and yelled at a chair for upwards of five minutes. Normally, I’d consider this a new all-time low in American politics, except that the Democratic Convention hasn’t started yet.

This was the first time ever in my entire life that I saw a crazy old man yelling at inanimate objects who wasn’t immediately snatched up by the cops and thrown into a psycho ward.

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I Am The Joker

AURORA, Colo. (AP) - New York City's police commissioner says the gunman in the Colorado movie theater rampage had painted his hair red and called himself the Joker -- the villain from the Batman movies.

Police Commissioner Raymond Kelly said Friday that he had been briefed about the shootings that killed 12 and wounded nearly 60 others at a showing of the new Batman movie "The Dark Knight Rises" at a suburban Denver theater.

--Associated Press via ABC News, Tampa, FL

In a now-predictable pattern, less than a day after the shootings in a Colorado movie theater screening The Dark Knight Rises, Emperor Barack Obama, who claims the right to assassinate anyone at any time anywhere, who maintains a "kill list" of potential assassination victims, and whose drone strikes have murdered thousands of civilians in Afghanistan, Pakistan and Yemen, delivered the now-standard scripted Tourette's outburst of false compassion and sympathy for murdered civilians in the Denver suburb of Aurora. Also, in a now-predictable pattern, the US news media fawned over the Boy Emperor's gushing unflinchingly, unquestioningly, and without the slightest sense of irony, even as they neglect to report on Obama's assassinations, mass murder, and acts of terror abroad.

As far as I'm concerned, the only difference between Boy Emperor Obama and the deranged college dropout in Colorado is that Obama has billions worth of lethal military hardware capable of killing thousands around the world along with the US mass media at his beck and call, and the deranged college dropout in Colorado had only a couple of pistols, an assault rifle, and a shotgun. For those of you with strong stomachs, here is the complete transcript of Obama's smarmy, hypocritical spewage at a campaign appearance in Florida.

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Based On A True Story

No, really, it is, at least parts of it.

I was on my way downstairs for a sandwich one late morning last week or so, and I passed by the bedroom, where the DW is catching up on some impresario chores on her laptop while the satellite box is nailed down to MSNBC. As aiways, I stop for a minute or two just to check out what they're emitting, and it's some woman who looked as if she were made entirely of plastic babbling an item about Hill leadership's reaction to the discovery that the US Olympic Team's uniforms had been made in China. Faster than you could say "eight percent unemployment", Harry Reid and John Boehner had crapped their drawers loudly while blurting out carefully crafted Tourette's episodes on the subject of the export of US jobs to China. After offering up this news, the anchorbabe said -- for real, I shit you not -- "At last, something that Democrats and Republicans can agree on."

"...along with war, torture, censorship, warrantless surveillance, assassinations, detention without trial..." the anchorbabe neglected to add.

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Hold Your Nose!

I first heard the lame Liberal rationale for voting against their values and interests -- "holding my nose" -- during the infamous "election" of 2000. In the decade or so since then, my reaction to that gutless cop-out has gone from outrage to annoyance to mild amusement to hysterics.

In every instance, my question -- still awaiting an answer -- has always been the same: how much longer are you going to sit still for the Democratic Party's abuse? What are you going to do when the stench gets so bad that holding your nose doesn't work?

The brain-dead philosophy of Liberal America -- "holding your nose" and voting for "the lesser evil" -- has yielded absolute zero in terms of any benefits. In fact, Liberals' continued insistence on voting against their interests pretty much fits the classic definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

So, you can imagine my shock and chagrin when I saw this recent article by Sam Smith -- normally a bastion of sanity and clear, independent thought -- advocating an "Obama One Night Stand" Movement, published at his Progressive Review. I didn't know whether to laugh until I pissed myself, or to go lay down on a railroad track.

If you insist on reading Sam's statement of capitulation to lesser-evilism, I strongly urge you to remove any cups of coffee or sleeping cats from the vicinity of your keyboard -- and if you've just taken a sip of coffee, swallow it immediately. You've been warned.

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