10.10.2012

Save Big Bird!


By now, all of you have heard Mittens’ Tourettes outburst about PBS funding at the last debate — you remember, the one where Obummer had his ass handed to him? Mittens commented in one breath that he liked Big Bird and Jim Lehrer, but if he were elected, he’d elminate PBS funding and throw them both out of work.

The Donkeycrats, desperate to make lemonade out of lemons, have taken to using that moment in a new campaign ad mocking Mittens for his popping off about Public Broadcasting — at which point, true to the Donkeycrats’ luck these days, the Sesame Street foundation pitched a fit over the Obummer campaign’s use of Big Bird in a campaign ad. Yeah, when it rains, it pours, huh?

My first thought on hearing Mittens’ little brain fart was “Christ, Mittens, why the hell are you doing handing the Donkeycrats ammunition like that?” Then, after settling down a bit, I realized that Mittens was being crazy like a fox, jerking Liberals’ chains and making them waste their time getting their panties in a twist over petty crap like cutting back PBS funding and endangering Big Bird. Still, this could be a plus for the Donkeycrats as it’ll give them one more way to divert Liberals’ attention from Obummer’s economic policy failures, imperialist adventurism overseas, and destruction of basic liberties at home by keeping them all pissing their pants over yet more meaningless hot-button culture-war bullshit — and to be perfectly frank, I couldn’t be enjoying the whole show more if I tried.

Mind you, though, this whole brouhaha fails to take into consideration the fact that Public Broadcasting has been a corporate whore since the beginning, even back in the days when they actually had decent programming, back when they picked up all those seasons of Monty Python and Fawlty Towers, and Carl Sagan’s Cosmos series, and broadcast the Grateful Dead’s New Year’s Eve show, and all those old Dr. Who episodes. These days they’re even worse, pure desolation for those of us looking for truly progressive viewpoints on the airwaves — infested with corporate apologists and Democratic Party mouthpieces — so I, quite honestly, could give a rat’s ass less about whether PBS is funded or not.

Still, Liberal America’s having a cow. Oh, noes! Wherever will they go to hear banal stories of the trials and foibles of affluent Liberals on This American Life? Wherever will they go to get that feeling of superiority they get from smug inanity like Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me? Wherever will Liberals go for their Democratic Party talking points and thirty-six solid hours of bluegrass? No, not Big Bird! God help ‘em, the End Times are here!

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